it’s hard to trust.
sometimes. most of the time.
it’s necessary to trust.
recently, I’ve been constantly reminded of both of these things. how painfully hard it is to trust sometimes, and how painfully necessary it is. i’ve been forced to do a lot of trusting. clinging to the light at the end of the tunnel. trusting
because i really can’t trust myself.
because the only way out sometimes is through.
because His ways are higher than mine.
and let me tell you, it hasn’t been easy. there’s been a lot of tears and a lot of brokenness, and there’s going to be a lot more. it hasn’t been fun and it won’t be. it’s not easy when things like
keeping your head up
remembering what it’s like not to be hurting all the time inside
get so incredibly hard, and it feels like no one understands.
it’s not easy when existing hurts.
i don’t really have an aim with this post, other than the hope that if you’re reading this and you’re finding it hard to trust God right now — if you feel so painfully, painfully alone — i can share this with you: i’m there too, and we will make it through —
(hold on to that when you can’t hold on to anything else.)
— not by our own understanding, but by leaning on God’s.
not by solving our own problems, but pushing through the crushing pain and letting God carry them for us.
i love you all. trust your Father. and trust me when i say this: you are not alone.
gonna be real, guys, i don’t really know where this post went, but i hope it speaks to someone (without me going into too much personal detail about my own recovery) because chances are that someone out there is going through the same thing that i am. and it’s okay. it’s okay to feel lost. just hold on tight to the knowledge that even though it doesn’t feel like it, you’re not lost because God’s got you. ❤
p.s. ‘pologies for us missing the last few weekends of posts! we’re hoping to get right back on track next weekend.
p.p.s. thank you all so much for one hundred follows! we’re honored to have all you wonderful dreamers along with us. mwah!